Is He Afraid of His Feelings for Me?
The mind of a man is complicated but straight-forward. They're cut back with emotional output and tend not to deal with large emotions well. Large emotions, such as...love. Do guys get scared of their feelings? Yes, but we all do. However, men are given less of a platform to express these fears/ doubts. Subsequently, we're all left in a grey area of miscommunication. To help guide you through this phase, we're here to break down the signs of him falling for you, signs that he's scared of falling for you, and signs he wants to commit but fears rejection, or is afraid to commit! Once you have this ammunition of knowledge, you can show a better understanding to your potential partner. His concerns don't necessarily reflect his feelings for you, so try not to take offense.
Signs a Guy is Scared of His Feelings for You
There are tell-tale signs that a guy is interested in you: when you notice them, things will become much clearer. Much like women, men drop hints first to test the water and see where they stand. If you notice and respond well, he may proceed to the next step. However, pride and insecurity might create an obstacle. That's where the confusion comes in. Let's first look at the signs he has feelings for you.
His body language is open/ inviting. Body language's a clear indicator of how someone feels about you. Their body's invariably more truthful than they are. If his body is always facing you, his arms are by his side, or when sitting down, his body is turned towards you...chances are he likes you.
He tries to make you laugh. If you notice him cracking jokes/pulling silly faces, take a note of it and see where it goes. If he likes you, it would be vital for him to see you smiling.
Maintains eye-contact. "The eyes are the windows to the soul". Maintaining eye-contact during a conversation shows interest/care.
He mirrors your body language. Aforementioned, body language's a key indicator. If you notice him mirroring your body language, then he's clearly in-tune with your body.
Spends a lot of time with you. When we like people, we want to spend more time with them. If he craves to see you in person more, it's a good sign.
Communicates. Much like wanting to see people we like a lot, this also extends to communication. If we can't see our favorite people, we fall to texts/calls.
He gets jealous of other guys. No one likes to think of their crush liking others. When a guy likes you, he'll get jealous of guys and might be overprotective.
Will spoil you with gifts. These don't have to be expensive ones, but he may decide to show it through little gifts, drinks, or even flowers if a guy likes you.
He calls you sweet names. Anything from "baby" to "sweet cheeks". Perhaps a bold move for someone who likes you as it makes it seem like you guys are already in a relationship.
Compliments you (often). One sure-fire way to get the flirty feelings flowing is to get the compliments going.
Tries to help you. The damsel in distress always needs her savior. When a guy likes you, he'll change the world and save the day. This undoubtedly stems back to our caveman days.
He changes his plans for you. Guys typically don't like to change their plans, especially last minute.
He makes more of an effort in his appearance. When he likes you, his insecurities can crop up? Subsequently, he may change his appearance so that he can impress you.
Offers you emotional support. Emotional support for men can be a touchy subject. They deal with emotions differently to women: if you find him trying in this department, then he's fallen hard.
He shares secrets with you. The ultimate proof of trust.
It's vital to note that each guy is different. Some guys will often go in the opposite direction of sweet to shield his emotions. It doesn't change how he feels about you but rather reflects his maturity levels.
Signs He Wants a Relationship but is Scared?
Making the jump from flirting to coffee dates and a relationship can be tough. Commitment's daunting, especially in this modern world of accessibility. As a result, men are finding it harder to commit to one partner. To help understand if the man you're interested in is struggling, here's what commitment phobia can look like in men.
Some see commitment as the end of freedom. A potentially selfish stance but one many men take.
Fear of boredom. There can be beauty in the mundane, but people seem to forget that. The cyclical notion of a relationship can appear boring to some guys.
He doesn't want to be exclusive to one person. He has a desire to date around. Past relationships/breakups and family taint their idea of love and commitment. You know how it is: one bad egg can ruin it for the rest. When a guy has a bad experience in a past relationship, he tends to take that into the next ones. This is an issue that can be overcome but takes time and understanding.
Men mature later than women. If you're a woman, we suggest trying to date a guy a few years older. You're more likely to be successful.
Some guys put off committing to make sure you're the real deal. It may seem harsh, but there's solid logic. Before committing to a relationship, he might want to see if you stand the tests. Be patient if you can.
Some men don't want the financial burden. A silly stereotype but one that some men adopt. If he sees you as a financial burden, then he might not be one to keep around. Also, ask yourself if you want too much? You can't expect him to pay for every meal; it's half or taking it in turns to keep things even.
Insecurity. The societal pressure of appearance extends to our male counterparts as well. Unfortunately, they're not yet given the platform to speak about this. Men get just as insecure as women do, and this can influence their decisions.
Fear of change. Change can be scary, regardless of gender.
Fear that they'll be emotionally responsible for their partner. When a man likes you, he'll offer you emotional support. However, they also don't want to have to deal with all of your emotions. Some men will worry that you'll become dependent on them, and they don't want that responsibility.
Do Guys Get Scared When They Fall in Love?
Anyone can get scared when they fall in love. It's a strong/daunting emotion, especially if you've been burned by it before. As a result, some guys will go out of their way not to fall for you so they don't get hurt again. Let's first look at the reasons why he might be trying not to fall for you.
Love makes us feel vulnerable. Not everyone is okay with this.
New love can bring up old hurt. People's ideas of love can be tainted over time.
Love can be unequal. No one wants to be in an unequal relationship.
Men struggle to process and deal with strong emotions. Subsequently, they tend to shut down in order not to feel/deal with it.
He thinks he doesn't deserve you. Related to the insecurity issue, when a man thinks he's not worthy, he'll try to take himself out of the equation. A reaction to protect his ego and heart.
After looking at the reasons, let's examine how these can be manifested in everyday behavior. The fear could be hiding in plain sight.
Lots of mixed signals. Serious one day and gone the next? Mixed signals show themselves in many ways but shouldn't be ignored. This can be a sign of his maturity.
You haven't met his parents. Potentially, for a cocktail of reasons, but he doesn't want to fall for you, then he won't want to see how well you get on with his folks.
Avoids opening up. In order not to appear vulnerable/ to trust you, he'll try to keep deep emotions out of your interactions.
The heart and mind are complicated places with emotional scars and odd thought processes. We could spend all day trying to figure out our loved ones, but it will get us nowhere. Some guys need more time/reassurance to commit. They could have been hurt in the past or may simply want freedom. The reason could be found through a conversation or through observation of actions. Regardless, you need to keep in mind what you want/need. Do guys get scared when they really like a girl? Yes they are, their biggest fear is rejection, But if he can't supply the right support or commitment, he is the wrong person.